He Texted 15 Mins After the First Date and Said He Was Looking Forward to Seeing Me Again

April 05, 2022 Post a Comment

The follow-up after a outset engagement is rarely equally elementary as: "I like you lot, I had fun, let'due south become together again." There are layers of meaning in texts to unpack, non to mention timing: who reaches out kickoff and how quickly does the other person respond? It can all feel like a behemothic chess match.

Either party can play coy because a)They don't want to look too eager/desperateand b)They're not certain how the other person feels, merely there are a number of cues that tin can confirm your date is going swimmingly. Below, our dating expert Rich Santos spells them out to spare you lot the next-day mental math.

1. Completing the Engagement

Low bar, nosotros know, just hear us out. Though seeing the date through to its end may seem similar an obligation for well-nigh people, Santos says there *are* exceptional dating disasters where you have to cutting information technology short for your own sanity.

"Most people are courteous enough to practise the absolute minimum on a date: finish whatever activeness you're doing together and devote sufficient time out of respect for the other person," he says. So provided your date'southward not running out with an "emergency text from a roommate" later on twenty minutes, it's an like shooting fish in a barrel start sign that things are going well.

2. Wanting More One-on-I Fourth dimension

When your date wants to spend time with yous alone instead of calling in fill-in for a grouping date, says Santos, information technology likely means that he'due south comfy effectually you and wants to spend more fourth dimension getting to know you. "One tactic to gainsay a tiresome date," he says, "is calling in 'reinforcement' friends" as social buffers.

"1 tactic to combat a boring date is calling in 'reinforcement' friends."

iii. Extending the Date

Suggesting something (other than going dorsum to someone's place) later on dinner is a solid indication that your date's request for an encore. "A masochist similar myself might ask a girl to spend more time with him if he's non enjoying her company," Santos says, simply if they're willing to extend the engagement by the "like shooting fish in a barrel out" first location of a bar or coffee shop, that's a practiced sign.

4. Suggesting Another Date

"Sometimes I get so excited during a first date I play my cards by suggesting other things we should practise together," says Santos, though timing may not be that immediate. A mutual fourth dimension to suggest another appointment is at the end of the first i. Some may exercise this as a friendly gesture before making a quick exit, says Santos, but information technology tin't be bad if your appointment is enthusiastic enough to propose a second meet-up. They just have to make good on their word.

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v. The Friendly Follow-Up Correct After You lot Say Proficient-goodbye

A good sign that a date went *really* well, says Santos, is when someone giddily follows up after a date to let you know they had a slap-up fourth dimension without waiting around. The alternative: "If I'm not interested after the date, I'll head straight domicile and brainstorm my process of fading out of this girl'south life (following upwardly is not part of that process)." Of course, not hearing back right away isn't a definite rejection, but the excitement of a speedy follow-up message speaks for itself.

half dozen. Striking While the Iron'southward Hot

When you lot don't get that speedy affirmation text, or a greeting inside a few days, it can mean a number of things. Waiting too long to follow up is a sign the other person is flaky or disinterested, which either way is non worth your fourth dimension. "If I enjoyed the date I'll contact her within a few days. This doesn't necessarily hateful I'chiliad request her out again. I'm just keeping the chat going," he says.

Existence ghosted or receiving non-committal responses without concrete plans to set up another date is another sure sign of disinterest. And though men ofttimes feel pressured to brand the first movement, there's no impairment in taking a feminist stance of reaching out first if yous're really interested.

"Hold him to a college standard than ane extra engagement, or ane think after the initial date."

seven. Consistency

When you start dating someone and haven't established exclusivity, says Santos, it'due south always important to mensurate signs that the other person is as on-lath equally you are. This could hateful making regular chat or establishing dates at a consistent frequency. "Agree him to a higher standard than one extra date, or ane telephone call dorsum later on the initial date. How many times have yous gone on a few dates only to have it fizzle out?" he says.

Transparency is key if you're not looking for anything serious, likewise.

8. Planning Spontaneous, Non-Cliché Dates

The breezy text to see if you accept the afternoon gratuitous to spend time together, unannounced, is the cardinal that someone'south thinking of you even when there'southward no pre-determined date. "Take notice when they ask you to do random little things similar run errands together or get to the park. It'southward that next stride when they're getting to know you that they want you around whenever, wherever," Santos says.

There'due south a big difference between the impromptu hangout invitation and the "lol u up?" text, though. If you're seeking a more serious relationship, pay attention to whether the other person is exclusively asking y'all to hang out at night or clearing their schedule for a daytime encounter-up.

Santos' bottom-line advice? "Employ these indicators every bit guidelines (they commonly build on each other every bit things progress)." Every relationship is dissimilar, but if you're not certain of where the other person stands, what'due south in that location to lose past asking?